About Therapy

I’m on a mission to help people-pleasers…

Have you been the caretaker in your family or friend group?

You’re the first person people call when they need a listening ear – and you’re there whether it’s 2 pm or 2 am. Maybe you’re good to cover brunch for both of you when you meet up with your bestie. What are friends for anyway? Except. There’s a feeling of resentment brewing. You enjoy knowing the people you care about are taken care of, but you’re noticing it doesn’t go both ways.

Do you experience a lot of anxiety or insecurity in your friendships and relationships?

If you’re the oldest daughter or only child… or were raised by a single parent or two-parent household where one parent was inactive…, chances are you do.

Not feeling seen or heard as a child can translate to needing a lot of reassurance in your relationships as an adult.

You might make assumptions about how a partner feels about you – Just because she says she loves me doesn’t mean she actually does. Everybody leaves me.

Work breaks are frequently filled with frustration. Why am I never good enough to be the lead on big projects? I work so hard, and no one cares.

Are you feeling tired and resentful these days?

If you’ve been a caretaker or mediator for a long time, you might resent these roles. Feeling overly responsible for everything (including others’ emotions) and trying not to burden others… it’s a recipe for frustration and exhaustion. I bet you’re the kind of person who would never let another struggle through their pain, yet that’s exactly what you’re doing during YOUR hard times.

Does it feel like you don’t even know who you are?

You probably realize that some of the roles you’ve taken on aren’t so easy to leave behind.

Figuring out what to do and what you want for your life is something you have no experience with. I mean, sure, you’ve dreamt up a few possibilities, but you don’t actually trust yourself to know what’s best. You want to know the “rules” and how it will turn out. Just thinking about it is overwhelming. If you’re thinking, “How do I know I’m making the right choices?” we can work on stepping out of the comforting box of perfectionism you’ve built in response to always being expected to figure things out.

This is your space to be seen and validated.

That’s right: This is where you can take a break from worrying about everyone else!

I listen carefully to what you say. And what you don’t say. When you’re used to people-pleasing and accommodating, it begins to happen everywhere – even in therapy.

As a recovering people-pleaser, I can see when it’s happening and call that sh** out immediately.

This is the one space where you do not need to take care of anyone but yourself. I’ve got you.

As someone who spent a long time searching for that space herself, I want that for you. Outside of sessions, I take really good care of myself by attending my own therapy and engaging in other healing practices.

In session, I show up fully myself and remain curious, playful, and calm as you try to show up as who you want to be.

I believe we hold so much in our bodies…

… more than we may know on the surface. We carry not just our own stories… but also those of our parents, grandparents, and other ancestors.

Your every emotion and sensation in your body is an entry point into a deeper sense of knowing who you are… and why you are the way you are.

We’re born with an inherent sense of following what we feel – trusting ourselves fully. Unfortunately, society, our upbringing, and the media all contribute to a one-way express train to disconnecting from ourselves.

The only way to experience self-love is to build self-trust.

Self-trust starts with getting reacquainted with your intuition and respecting your body’s cues.

If you’re used to seeking approval, you’re likely used to going against your body’s wisdom. But your body isn’t the enemy. In fact, it has your best interest at heart.

Our work together starts with slowing down, asking questions, and really listening to your internal response.

I firmly believe you already know what you want. Establishing trust with yourself will get you there.

A space to be ALL of who you are…

When Natalie logged into our first session…

She felt anxious because she didn’t know what to expect. She had been trying to find a therapist for so long.

A lesbian with Dominican roots, finding a therapist with shared identities made her feel seen… and exposed. She appreciated how I didn’t question her experience… but it wasn’t as easy to BS her way through. Unlike previous therapists, this shared understanding gave her more time to dig deeper.

It wasn’t long before Natalie began looking forward to our weekly sessions, making notes during the week to make the most of our time together.

She always thought she just wasn’t the type to go to therapy. Now, she knows that it was all about finding HER right-fit therapist.

Jada was THE go-to person…

But Jada didn’t have anyone to go to herself. It was just “easier that way.” She called herself the “ultimate compartmentalizer,” never letting any of her friends or family know the pain she was carrying.

By day, she kicked a** as the first Black professor at the predominantly white institution she had once attended as an undergrad.

But at night, it was a different story. Jada was experiencing major imposter syndrome, self-criticism, and a constant fear that she wouldn’t last in this role. Sometimes she eased her mind with a glass of wine or two. When she started working from home, two glasses a night turned into several drinks in the afternoon and evening after teaching classes.

Jada needed a therapist who wouldn’t pathologize her drinking and instead look at the additional pressure she faced as a Black woman in an institution not built for her to succeed.

She had always dated men and even had a son from a previous long-term relationship.

A couple of months ago, she and a woman at her job became closer than close, and she allowed herself to explore her curiosity. Melissa reached out to me after seeing that I take an intersectional approach to therapy. She needed a safe space to sort through these new feelings without the pressure of checking a box. She appreciated that I saw sexuality as fluid and allowed her to identify the way she wanted without telling her who she was.

Therapy with me gave Melissa permission to be her full self and truly explore what she wanted in a partner and for her life.

Note: All names have been changed to protect confidentiality, and all scenarios are a composite and do not necessarily belong to one particular client.